Aid (continued)

Or should we say it is the curse of our academical formation that we cannot simply enjoy the scene like the other participants seem to do? Why criticize good intents? And I think a litlle desperate: ¨oh no, please, I do not want to become a cynic at 23 years young...¨

Jerry gives us a ride back and we cannot help to pose a few cautious questions. On the clothes they bring and whether it would not be better to help them conserve their own beautiful clothing. Mireille, the gringa woman, is quick to taste our critique even though we try to hide it in a played naivety. ¨Oh no, we do not want to them to stop wearing their beautiful customs, that is why we only bring clothes to the men, that wear western clothes most of the times and for the girls just t-shirts they can wear under their customs.¨
(silence)
Another try by Carolina: ¨You know, one of the young farmers just told us about the peach trees they planted and how they cannot pay a technician, would that be something to help in?¨
Mireille: ¨Oh I did not know that, but you know we are now trying to get them a bull, so that they get more baby calves!¨ Ending with a triumphant smile.
In the silence that follows I think of the mountain landscape here in Los Altos de Chiapas, of the poor vegetation, of the scarcity of water, of how the farmer told me they do not have land themselves, but need to rent even to make their milpas. And trying to find the naivest voice without a hint of accusation (you guys know what an effort that is for me when I am strong about something...): ¨I just wonder what those cows are going to eat?¨
When Mireille answers defiantly that they also gave them an electric fence and that they already had cows anyhow, Carolina tries to broaden the lines of the discusion: ¨You know, we work in the Selva and we have the same problem. You see, you bring things or knowledge to satisfy needs, but often you are at the same time creating new needs. Like with the protein banks, the banks of forage plants that we showed them to make. This way of semi-intensive feed production reduces the need to open up new forest land to pasture the cattle. But now the farmers say they need a cutter (that works on petrol...) and an electric fence...¨.
(silence)
Me in a reconciliating manner: ¨You know we face the same dilemmas, it would just be good to share our doubts and learn from each other.¨
(silence)
Mireille changes the subject with renewed energy: ¨You know next week I am flying to Guatemala, because I do this work all the time, being retired I just go to poor villages where they need help. Actually we are looking here in Chiapas for new villages, aren´t we Jerry? Poorer ones, because San Hisidrio already has quite some things. So how about your communities in la Selva? You say they do not even have a road, so I am sure they are really poor and very few people come to bring them things?¨
I get a horror vision of the small air plane landing in Amador Hernandez, the people crowding around it and Mireille stepping out like a queen, telling them all: ¨Please line up people, I bring you gifts from the generous people in the USA¨, helding up the barbies and base-ball caps.
Just when I imagine how our proud farmers linch her, Carolina ends Mireille´s dream and my nightmare: ¨You see, the only way to enter is a day long walk through the mud, or by plane which is really expensive.¨